That feeling of being trapped in your own emotions, overwhelmed, and trying to keep your head above water. Seeking for that much needed, well deserved adventure. The exhaustion sits in. The powerless sensation. The need for more begins to take over.
Wondering about the unknown and how promising it looks. The drive for change, looking in every direction to discover the fear of what unfolds unexpectedly. The anticipation to experience a new adventure. Feeling for that adrenaline rush. Adventure for some implies recklessness. It implies freedom and to experience something new. The willingness to travel across the country, one's willingness to cross oceans and continents. Traveling and being a tourist has changed society in many different ways. Adventure comes in many different forms and it's known differently thought-out the world. The word adventure evolved in the 1200-50: middle English, which was borrowed from the old French aventure. Adventura and advenire are also different forms, recognized in Latin. In traditional Chinese, they pronounce adventure Màoxiǎn. They define the word as being risky, a gambler, and hazard. In Greek, its pronounced περιπέτεια. To take a chance, jeopardize, and tempt providence. The concept of adventure is embodied in the early American explorer. It's resulted in the riches and ruins. Lewis and Clark became famous for it. Lewis and Clark began their adventure in May 1804 in St. Louis Missouri. Their adventure became the first American expedition. They crossed the western portion of the United States. They traveled 8,000 miles over a three-year span. They encountered many obstacles. "They braved dangerous waters and harsh weather and endured hunger, illness, injury, and fatigue" (A&E Network. 2018. P1). Along their journey they came across two members, Sacagawea and Touissant Charbonneau, which became their interpreters through their expedition. Spaceship X is another form of adventure. It's a spaceship designed to carry people and cargo to different orbiting destinations. In 2012, Spaceship X made history by successfully transporting cargo to the Space Station and safely returning it back to Earth (Space Exploration Technologies Corp., 2017). The focus of creating Spaceship X was to carry humans to the orbiting destinations, but it became a cargo transporter instead. NASA has been developing a new SpaceX that will allow a crew to fly inside the spaceship safely. They plan to introduce the new SpaceX in 2018. The Journey to Africa, is a different type of adventure. It's adventure of the unthinkable. A journey of slavery. The Europeans traveled to take over and operate the slave ships. The West Africans were the ones who would capture the slaves. The slaves would be transferred and sold to different owners. Some were taken to forts and compounds. The slaves who were transported to the compounds had to aboard a slave ship. "Upon boarding, they were stripped of their belongings, branded, chained, and sent below decks, where they would be forced to remain for most of the months-long journey" ("A Journey in Chains,"). Olaudah Equiano was one of the slaves on the slave ship. He described his journey as a living nightmare. He remembers the screaming, crying, and moaning. How the conditions were unbearable. "Those who were not killed by conditions on board were often permanently disabled by beatings or disease" ("A Journey in Chains"). Even though, they endured significant amounts of torcher, they successfully came out on top and took over the ship in 1839. In today's world, our society describes the word adventure as a spontaneous luxury. All around the world we are bombarded with pictures of the purist white beaches and amazing sunsets. Articles, magazines, the internet are advertised with "amazing" deals and all-inclusive resorts for cheap or little to nothing prices. It makes dreams seem reachable and reality seem questionable. An adventure waiting to happen. Printed in black bold letters. "Well, you don't know what we can find, why don't you come with me little girl on a magic carpet ride, well, you don't know what we can see, why don't you tell your dreams to me, Fantasy will set you free" (Steppenwolf, Magic Carpet Ride, 1968). Musicians have the effect with their words to make one's fantasies seem real and touchable. Celebrities put on a persona to envy their luxury and lifestyle. The reality is, an adventure is something you experience, bad or good. It can have a negativity outcome or an amazing story. We seek what we don't know and attempt to obtain more than what we have. All around us there are things, places, and people who will make us feel a certain way. Everyone has an adventure, it's the way you see it for yourself. "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder" (Margaret Wolfe Hungerford, Molly Bawn, 1878). Discovering the adventure inside, that feeds that adrenalin rush and smoothers the anxiety of the unknown.
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Have you ever been on a roller coaster, soaking wet, and up for 3 days straight? Unfortunately, often, expectation and reality are two different things. And you may think it’s terrible, but your mind races with how your life will change in ways you can hardly predict. Are you sure you don’t want to ‘accidentally’ fall down that flight of stairs, or maybe research the different options you may have. “Some women find complete satisfaction in the role, while others are forced to make difficult choices or wish they had remained childless” (Williams, Margaret. 2018, A Mother’s Promise). You never considered adoption and abortion isn’t something you could live with for the rest of your life. It’s not too late to turn back now, is it? You’re forced with a baby you never expected. How will your life change? Months pass, you’re sick. You don’t sleep, and you constantly have this foot in your ribs. Then, the day arrives, a million things race through your mind. Are you going to be a good mom? Is she going to love you? Are you going to love her? Will she be the precious package you expect? You recall the stories told by your friends about how you’ll bond with your baby and how breast feeding brings you closer together. But, your nipples are raw, bleeding, and you start to realize that was such a bunch of garbage. How can anyone continue to do this? Why would anyone recommend having a baby suck the life from you in the most painful way? Sigh. You can’t seem to wrap your head around this concept of being a mother. Flashbacks from your past come to mind when your mom used to sing a poem, “Roses are red, violets are blue, there isn’t a star as sparkling as you. Roses are red, violets are blue, as deep as the ocean, feels my love for you” (Keep calm network, 2009, P1). That poem continued to play in your head over and over, eventually becoming a tortuous durge. It never came to mind, until this moment, you were in the same position as your mother. What were you thinking? Why do you feel this way? You grunt with disgust as yellow greenish poo runs down your arm, and you smile as if you enjoy the warmth. Deep breaths. Hold it together. You got this. She starts to wail-like you were the one who’d unloaded oozing feces all over her. You change her, feed her, rock her, and sing her favorite tune. Nothing seems to help. You have black baggy eyes from no sleep and you haven’t taken a shower in days. Worse, you’re fairly certain all you’ve had to eat was cold pizza from a couple of days ago. Her favorite commercial comes on, which seems to catch her attention, so you’re able to catch a moment of silence. Your eyes wander, thinking about what else needs to be done. The sink is full of dishes. The laundry looks like a volcano exploded, and what the heck is that smell? Is that you? You’ve been so busy you can’t even remember the last time you showered. Her distraction, fleeting as it maybe, seem the perfect time to catch a quick rinse while she’s occupied… just enough time to wash your hair, rinse your body, and shave your legs. I mean, you look like a werewolf. Then, you jump for joy when you realize it’s time for bed. Time to snuggle this so called sweet precious baby. Her blue eyes wide-awake just starting at you, cooing away, blowing bubbles, and it suddenly occurs to you. This is the moment you’ve been waiting for. You’ve waited for this feeling, this moment, the entire time. Your heart melts away with every smile, with every giggle. Eskimo kisses, baby and mommy kisses… BURP! Throw up all over and inside your mouth. Disgusted, you put her down to clean yourself, defeated and exhausted. What the hell was I thinking? A new thought- as soon as I get the chance I’m getting my tubes tied. Finally, she’s sound asleep. Should you start the laundry, put those dishes away, or continue getting swallowed away by this couch? Too late. Everything’s becoming foggy and further away. You drift away, dead to the world, only to be awakened by a French bull dogs kiss. Terrified, you jump from the couch and start to panic. Anxiously, you run to her room to find her quietly sleeping, running your fingers over her mouth, placing a hand over her belly, and gasping with relief that she’s thankfully safe and unaware, so you stumble back to your room to find your boyfriend spread-eagle on the bed. Well, I guess that means the couch is your bedroom for now. Days, months, years pass and, even though circumstances change dramatically in different ways, the struggle is still real. The dirty diapers, messy faces, and up every two hours, is replaced by a whole different kind of adventure. You cuddle falls, wipe tears, play every kind of make-believe person or thing. You still can’t shower, sleep by yourself, or get anything done around the house. She becomes your best friend and the love of your life. She’s the reason you laugh harder, love deeper, and cry more. Even so, your love grows, and your bond is inseparable. “To my daughter. Never forget that I love you. Life is filled with hard times and good times. Learn from everything you can. Be who I know you can be” (Quote Ambition, 2018, P1). As a mother you’ve had your struggles, but they’ve only made you stronger. You’ve learned how to breathe, ignore the things you can’t change, shape the things you can, and love with all your heart. You’ve conquered one hill with the rest of the mountain to go. And it was a grueling uphill climb. No time for rest. That beautiful clumsy girl needs guidance, someone to show her what’s right and what’s wrong. You started this crazy roller coaster adventure thinking you were going to change her life. In reality, she changed yours. |